Exciting News!

More details as they come available.

Huh!?

I have a student this year who is quite a trip. He has autism, which isn't all that unusual at the school where I teach students with severe disabilities. Yes, he has autism, but he has something else. Most days he talks and talks and talks, and none of it really makes any sense. His sentences are usually grammatically correct, but . . . wow! 

One day, in the space of an hour or so, I wrote down verbatim some of the things he said. Sometimes there is a semblance of continuity in his speech, but not really. Imagine a kid, sitting at a table rocking back and forth, talking non-stop to no one in particular in a stream-of-conscious sort of way, shooting off sentences one right after another. Oh, and one other thing--read this fast in a monotone voice to get the full effect:

It's not up there if you can't get it down.

Heavenly Father is on the Earth today.

There's no graveyards here.

It's a hassle being crazy all the time.

A little girl is chasing off that butterfly over there.

If the pepperoni sticks are gone, you're nuts.

Grandpa's underwater, so shut up.

What's in the temple? Closets? Grandpa's in the closet.

I don't want a donut this weekend.

I opened the ducks.

That's a hot potato, man--burning, freezing.

Why are we playing hockey with the donuts in it?

He wants a red donut, already.

The clouds in the sky are speaking spanish.

Don't say bad words because Jesus and Heavenly Father will call your dad.

It's a fire drill out there.

Yogurt is full of nuts this weekend.

Jesus is in Heaven in bed.

A hippopotamus and an elephant are at the fire drill.

Boil like an egg.

It's bad to scream like that.

If you bite down on your ankle, it's going to get worse.

It's going to stop an ankle so bad.

I'm a mother, that's what I heard, so shut the hell up.

Talk dopey, dopey, dopey.

Jumping off is going to f*ck up your day.

There comes fishies. They're going to bite us.

We got baptized in the temple in Park City with Grandpa in Kanosh [a town in south-central Utah].

Jafar is autistic.

Well, there it is--about an hour's worth of chatter. It's all in a day's work.